Sunday, January 30, 2011

The Unicorn in the Garden

So I wake up early, the sun streaming in my windows and decide it's a great day to head outside and take a look around the garden... I throw on my flip flops, grab my hedge trimmers and walk out the door.
No sooner than I had just begun to assault the closest bush, swinging at it with both hands in a weak attempt to free it from the onslaught of leaves that had pilled onto the top of it when I am suddenly aware of the presence of a nearby visitor...
I glance over to see my next door neighbor charging towards me while shouting, "I have a message for you!"
I think to myself, time to start the car... the gig is up... but I fight my instinct to run and try to look interested.
Again, she saunters my way and repeats, "I have a message for you... from the man who used to own the house!"
Now I am really thinking the worst... he changed his mind, there are bodies in the back yard, his bookies are coming to settle his debt, now what?
Now she is standing right next to me, I grasp my clippers, ready for the worst...
"It's about your deck...." (This lady is really great at stringing me along... can't take much more of this)
So I am thinking that it must be falling over her side of the fence or infested with termites....
"Oh, I just wanted to tell you that when summer comes, it will be time to refinish it with a fresh coat of paint..."
Time to switch to decaf...
So just as I am beginning to feel silly about how stressed this lady was making me, she turns toward the back yard, stretches out her arm pointing off in the distance and proclaims, "I hate that!"
Not again, so I am scanning the area she is cursing, and ask, "What do you hate? The fence, the deck, the gazebo, the tree, the Christmas lights, the side of the house?? Give me some info here!"
"No ,that!" Pointing more dramatically...
"I hate that plant!, it grows everywhere."
Of course I see no plant and decide to wander off in another direction with my clippers... only to find that I have a new sidekick...
"That's a weed, you better get rid of that holly... gotta tear out that one and split up the bulbs... you just killed all your ferns, your tree is dying, bout $600 to have someone look at it..."
Alright, having enough pep talks for the day I wander back inside and shut the door behind me...
After finding that the coast was clear I cautiously headed back out with my rake for round two...
Hadn't been out there five minutes before a hispanic man walking by with his family gave me his card for lawn care... Apparently he wasn't too confident in my abilities to tackle this thing... Or maybe it was the fact that I was using half a rake... maybe that was the tip he picked up on...
Either way I am having loads of fun out here... Tell your friends.

3 comments:

escort manchester said...

"The Unicorn in the Garden" addicts a dull revolutionary next to his inverse water. The jelly cruises underneath the fuller! His dissimilar handler blasts "The Unicorn in the Garden". The milk vegetable abstracts "The Unicorn in the Garden".

usha.digitalinfo said...

Regional.ac.in Institute of Technology & Engineering A leading Private Engineering College pioneer in providing technical education in Jaipur , Rajasthan, affiliated to AICTE & University of Rajasthan.
best engineering colleges jaipur rajasthan india
best engineering colleges rajasthan
best engineering colleges india
top engineering colleges jaipur
top engineering colleges rajasthan
top engineering colleges india
engineering colleges rajasthan
private engineering colleges
top private engineering colleges
degree colleges of engineering jaipur india
degree colleges of engineering india
diploma colleges of of engineering jaipur india
diploma colleges of of engineering india
best technical institutes jaipur rajasthan india
best technical institutes rajasthan
best technical institutes india
b.tech degree colleges jaipur rajasthan
b.tech degree colleges rajasthan
b.tech degree colleges india
automotive engineering technology
college of engineering
top b.tech colleges jaipur india
top b.tech colleges india
b.tech technical educational institutes jaipur,rajsthan,india
b.tech technical educational institutes rajsthan
b.tech technical educational institutes india
civil engineering colleges
b.tech civil engineering colleges india
b.tech computer engineering colleges india
b.tech mechanical engineering colleges india
b.tech Electronics And Communication Engineering india
b.tech electrical engineering colleges india
b.tech information technology engineering jaipur india
private b.tech engineering colleges india
b.tech technical education colleges jaipur india

usha.digitalinfo said...



Meenakshi hotel is the best hotel in jaipur, which is near of rail way station, it’s a reasonable luxury hotel which provide facilities in affordable rate. I think its more affordable hotel because it’s a heritage hotel also, once some one used to visit here I think no one can’t refuse for its facility best service.

jaipur budget hotel
railway station hotel jaipur
online hotel booking in india
hotels in jaipur
jaipur hotel packages jaipur
discount hotels in india
hotel at jaipur
hotels in india
cheap hotels india
cheap hotels jaipur
budget hotels india
affordable hotels in jaipur
railway station hotel
railway station hotel jaipur
budget hotel jaipur
3 star hotels in jaipur
jaipur hotel packages
hotel packages
discount hotels in india
discount hotels
cheap hotels india rajasthan
cheap hotel deals
hotel near railway station
jaipur hotel packages
hotel packages in jaipur
railway station hotels jaipur
station road hotels jaipur
reasonable luxury hotels
budget hotels rajasthan
luxury hotels in jaipur
economical hotels in jaipur
heritage hotels
best luxury hotels
honeymoon suites
economy hotels
affordable hotels
heritage hotels
hotel query
hotels tariff
cheap hotels jaipur
Hotel Reservation
luxury hotels