Same Old Thing

Yes, Oregon is just like Maui, except for the snow...

Here is what I did when I made it home.

Live From the AIrport

Today has been a thrilling day and I am sure the fun will extend well into the evening.
So yeah, I have issues with numbers...
I always have...
So when I tell you that I will be leaving on the 31st, you can bet I got the wrong day...

Last time I came out I actually mixed up the departure and arrival locations and accually paid in full for a pair of tickets leaving from a different state.

So it should come as no surprise, after casually glancing at my online ticket info, realizing I had the wrong day, and driving as fast as I could to secure my place in line in these times of heightened security... ready for my new and improved pat down...
That I am 5 hours early and after getting a hundred feet from my gate I am told that the kids that need to screen my bag are still on their lunch break and to come back later...

Good times...

On the bright side there is free wireless...
And I can work on my paper that I never gave a second glance.

Not Your Everyday McDonanlds

Here in the islands and throughout the world, McDonalds likes to bring in a certain flair by taking on the customs and favorites of their surroundings.
This is demonstrated with tailored side dishes to fit the pallets of local visitors.
Examples include, removing beef and beef products in India, refried beans in Mexico, Beer in Germany, and out here in Hawaii, Spam in the Extreme Breakfast... and chickens watching you eat.

Where My Frogs At?

Merry...

Today I have seen the worst movie ever.
Ok, one of the top 15 worst...

It was cruel, painful, and un-ending...
The writing was bad, the sets were lame...
I can't say enough...

My sister had the empty popcorn bin on her head through half of it.

They wined on about....
Words can't possibly do justice...

Worst film...

You should see it...

Have you heard about the Morgans?

Captain's Log

3:30 on a Monday afternoon...
83 degrees and visibility off the port bow as far as the eye can see...
Time for my daily nap and then back to the beach.

I was going to say that was all...
But I just remembered my William Shatner story...

So I was on the plane and overheard the lady in front of me mention that Shatner was going to be in Lahaina signing books at the Hard Rock Cafe...
Later my sister calls to tell us that someone bailed out and that her friend gets to be his opener.
Corky is totally stoked that her friend is going to be on stage with Shatner (and national television), and tags along to wish him well...

Of course she isn't about to shell out the $50 door fee to get inside, so she stands in the windows... Cheering on her friend from a far.

Seeing as this was a book signing, it was a tough crowd from the get go, but after the first round of silence, it was obvious that her friend wasn't going to make it...

After crashing and burning, he walks off the stage with head hung low...
That is when he was informed not to worry about it, since they would be pumping in the laugh tracks later...

This is where things get interesting...

One of the local characters in town is a lovable young junkie that specializes in origami art... primarily in the form of tinfoil...
This art has yet to be recognized by any major galleries, but when compared with the alternative of getting an actual job, seems more appealing.

This skilled young man has a knack for creating fanciful works with the sole objective of winning free passage into the show of his choice.... he searches for shows that are new to town and sets to work designing a spellbinding homage that will surely win over his prey.

This time he set himself the challenge of creating the entire Star Trek Space Ship Enterprise out of foil... complete with Data and semi-functional laser beams...

After waiting patiently outside for his opportunity to share his craft with his newest idol his opportunity finally arrives...
Keep in mind that this kid just spent over a hundred hours folding an entire spaceship and has been waiting all night...

Shatner walks out the door, sees the foil ship, crushes it and throws it in the trash...
Leaving the kid crushed as well...

It's Not Easy Having a Good Time

Tis the Season

For department stores to start selling creepy Christmas elves, with metal crab claws, invented with the sole function of choking unsuspecting shoppers...

I mean really, come on. What else could this thing be good for?

Right Place at the Right Time

Seems to be the element to success...
And for me, yesterday, it really was.

I had been invited to a little get together in honor of a friend's birthday...
At some point in the evening, someone arrived with a small blueberry cheesecake.

I was instantly thrilled... Since it is one of my favorite things...

Being his birthday, I patiently waited for him to do the honors of cutting the first slice. This was a bit of a challenge as he was very preoccupied with the festivities...

I did what I could to help the inebriated birthday boy find his way to the cake... Strategically placing the knife nearby and clearing the table of other distractions...
Many times over the course of the evening, he wandered into the kitchen, looked at the pristine cake, even going as far as to pick up the knife and hold it precariously near the cake; only to have one of his guests announce their departure and demand his attention yet again...

Knife back on the table, and guests looking down with disappointment...

After around an hour of this charade, I gave up...

Upon returning home, I realized that I felt sad for missing the cute little cheesecake...
I stared at the clock, realizing the patisserie would only be open for ten more minutes...
Finally as the clock inched towards failure, I couldn't take it any more...

I jumped in the car and made a mad dash for the only place I could think of...

I made it with 6 minutes to spare and the bystanders cheered my efforts...

I walked in the door with more determination and purpose than I had applied in years. I had one mission, and hell or high water I was getting that cheesecake...

When I hit the counter, I scanned it carefully for my prize, but sadly there was no blueberry cheesecake to be seen... I asked if there were any in the fridge, and after taking a moment to check, he said that they were all out aside from the full size $40 one... He took a moment and asked me if I wanted that one...

I explained that I just waited an hour for a slice of one earlier, but that the instigator was too intoxicated to find it, and how I had given up.

After another 3 seconds and said I had to have it.
Ha asked if I wanted anything written on it.
I said, "Poor Impulse Control".

Off he went and returned again, with some bad news... He had realized that the only one he had left was slightly imperfect and that he couldn't sell it to me.

He asked if I was ok with that....

And handed me the cake.

So that is how at 11:00 on a Saturday, I was gifted a blueberry cheesecake and all was right in the world.

Nothing Like Coming Home...

After a long day...
And getting Blasted in the face with high powered remote controlled flashes....

Good times...

And it only took about ten minutes to regain partial sight... So all good news.

We were testing them out for a friend, and being all about quality control, had to ensure that they were working properly...

Are We Having Fun Yet?

It is 13 degrees in the morning, and it takes 20 minutes to defrost my car... The car next to me has to be plugged in at night...
This is getting a bit ridiculous...

My students have taken to skating in the drainage ditches near my house, which have frozen solid, and the ducks have taken to our school parking lot as an alternative meeting spot.

I don't mind the weather, but we are all looking out the window and thinking the same thing... What is it going to take to get some snow?

Thankfully I only have a few days left till I am out the door and on to better things, namely frozen freeways, traffic, airport terminals, and baggage fees...

I can't wait to stand in line with a 40 pound backpack, slowly being herded through the crowd, only to have the first person I am able to make eye contact with riffle through my purse and demand I remove my shoes...

At least I have a good sense of humor about it all... but still, the experience is usually a trying one and takes it's toll...

So in other news, today was midterms for my students...
We are half way through our 9 week term and things are going pretty well...

I have four classes and some of their projects are pretty interesting.
In one class we are doing ten step movies... they pick the topic and walk away with their own movie on the subject.
Here are some of their topics: making a bomb out of diet Pepsi and Mentos (can't wait), a flash dance tutorial, a skateboarding trick film, and a film that thus far seems to be about eating my lunch.

The lunch one always happens... I make the mistake of telling the class they can demonstrate simple food items. Inevitably they end up asking if they can make a sandwich, this usually requires multiple takes and multiple sandwiches...
But what do I care, I am all for quality, and if it takes five sandwiches to get it right, so be it.

In other, other news...
I just signed up for a fun class on behavior management... The course books sports a dramatic photo of a little girl melting down on the playground... It looks like a good time. I think you can never have too many tricks up your sleeve when it comes to conflict resolution, so I am going to see if I can rack up a few more...

Alright, that is all till I can get you some more pictures.

The list is pretty much complete

The only thing that was left on my list of items to acquire was a vita mix blender.
I haven't named it yet, but it is sitting in my kitchen, waiting to obliterate what ever I feed it.
Maybe I'll call it Seymour...

Day three...
My teeth, or at least the holes where they used to be, hurt.
I was doing good for the first few days, not needing anything to get along, but over the last day or so I have finally started to notice the throbbing and am looking forward to the end of it.

I got to keep two of my molars, which I know sounds odd... But that was just the last thing the nurse asked...I thought well if I am going to have a $2,000 procedure, I might as well have a keepsake...
So I said I would take the bottom ones.

I handed the bag to Autumn when I came home, she freaked out slightly and dropped the bag onto the floor.
I was worried they would break, but so far so good, they are hanging in there...

I suppose they will probably go in the curio cabinet, seeing as the coffee table might not be the best place for them...

Thanksgiving should be an interesting one for me...
I just want to sleep, sip smoothies, and watch movies... And I feel I have earned that privilege. It hurts to talk, so why would I want to socialize. I have plenty of potatoes around the house... So that is my plan.

Week in Review

Hey there,
I have fallen off the wagon, and it seems that the topic of all my posts as of late have been on my lack of posting...
But I suppose that is better than nothing at all...

This week I have started a new round of classes and met my newest batch of students...
So far so good. We are still in the honeymoon phase where they are slowly testing the limits and seeing what will fly.

The first thing I had my new students do was to write me a letter and tell me more about themselves... I had the opportunity to read through the first batch and found out some very interesting facts about my groups... I found out that many of them have chickens and interesting home lives, some of their families own businesses, and a few of them are thrilled to have a change of pace and be in a new class...

I have also started a new term of video productions and am quite sure that this group will be keeping me on my toes, as demonstrated by the first day of filming and a group that has already announced that they have finished the first project and are ready for a new one...
Of course they are not done, and I will go into all of the tedious little steps that are required before completion, but it is just great to see that I have a batch of students that are chomping at the bit and trying to torture me so early on...

In other news I am all set for my upcoming dental experience and have signed up to have my class commandeered by a veteran sub who I am sure will fine that my students are a thrilling group to behold.

Other than that this weekend I will begin my latest side project of helping other schools to get their equipment up and running. This will entail heading out to schools on the weekends and getting their equipment reimaged and ready for the year that is very much underway.

This week we received our latest batch of laptops and will be using them to replace teacher machines with the newest models and pass their old machines back onto the students to help classes have a higher ratio of machines and do more interactive projects...

That is all... Signing off...

Absent Minded Baking

I have been trying to get back into the kitchen to create anything these days, and have been sliding off the radar after each attempt. So today, I am trying to focus a little more time to this small feat and accomplish anything at all...

Aiming small with the modest goal of no less than 160 cookies, and that is all they are going to get...

In other news, I messed up royally at work the other day...
I blame my phone and inept assistants...
I knew that I had a class to teach down town, like I do most weeks...
So in preparation I printed out all me handouts and reviewed the topics to be taught.
All seemed ready to go and I reached my class with time to set up and get started...
I distributed the handouts and got going with no troubles...
Only half way through the class one of the members mentioned that she had thought we would be covering podcasting... I informed her that we were learning about podcasting, just through some new mediums, such as cell phones and video conferencing, and recommended that she sign up for my class that specifically covers the basics of recording and publishing... She apologized for not reading the course description more carefully and in the end, everyone had a nice time and walked away learning some new things...

So one of my teachers at school asks if I would be available to help her after school, and I tell her that I will check my calendar and see if I am free or teaching another class downtown...
You can imagine my surprise when I see the class I taught last week scheduled for next Tuesday....

Yup, you guessed it, I taught the wrong class and the lady that had seemed so confused by the handouts had been right... The class that I recommended for her had actually been the one she signed up for...

Well that was a first and I will be sure to take my calendar out of agenda mode to make sure that doesn't happen again...

The bright side is that I am definitely ready for this week's class and that everyone learned something new weather they meant to or not...

Whoops.

Got the Penny

Hey Dad,
Thanks for the penny.
It has been credited to your account and will post in two to three business days.
Your confirmation number for this transaction is 7002954.
Please keep this number for your records.
If there are any issues with your payment, you will be contacted at the number listed in your account.
Here at Gardner Inc. we value your business and look forward to many more payments to come.
This completes your transaction, if you have any questions about your account or current bill, please feel free to contact our agency during business hours or via email at your convenience.

Thank you and have a great day...

I like the penny...
I added it to the curio cabinet and even changed the bulbs again so it can really shine.
I am really surprised by how clean and shiny the penny is, surely after traveling for nearly 100 years, it would have become worn and dulled by passing hands, but it seems just as you had suggested that this little coin must have been loved and forgotten in the bottom of a piggy bank.

Now it can be put in a place of honor and forgotten behind glass, where it belongs...

Happy Halloween

So this Halloween we made the annual pilgrimage up to Corvallis to Diana's house for cupcakes and bonfires, while being entertained by the entire cast of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, complete with everyone's favorite reporter, April, the bad boys of pizza, and of course, our hostess, Shredder.

Autumn and Steve came as the H1N1 Virus, and I walked out the door in my usual attire as a pillaging pirate... Like ya do.

All went well, and the evening wasn't complete until we all had our pizza, with extra anchovies, of course... (on a side note, I wouldnt have wanted to be the delivery man that night, seeing as the entire house rushed the car, dressed as giant turtles with sticks, swards and knives... I am sure the guy totally deserved his tip...)

Sincerest Apologies to the Smallest of Things

This morning I hurt something and someone in a careless act and wanted to express my deepest apology, though I know it will never be heard.
This morning, while getting ready for work, I came upon a small spider in my shower.
Though it was a tiny little creature, which I would have usually enlisted the assistance of others to remove, I found myself in a predicament with no one around to assist me...
With no one to call upon, I took it upon myself to remedy the issue single handedly and found some difficulty in resolving the situation...
I attempted to capture the creature... though it had done more than it's fair share to get out of my way... clinging to the inside of the shower curtain, in a modest attempt not to be a burden or inconvenience to me...
Sadly, being short on time, I did not heed it's gesture and went out of my way to remove it...
with a soggy piece of cardboard and small glass I attempted to catch it, and in the act accidentally dismembered the creature, tearing off one of it's legs...
The silent captive writhed in what I assumed was much distress and pain, with it's severed limb clinging from under the glass, and still pulsating with the fading glimps of connection with it's former friend.
I felt bad about it all day, and thought I would do my best to apologize and explain that I wish my little intruder no ill will and that I hope the little accident will not inhibit it's long life and future scampering...

I am sorry little spider,
please forgive my haste, I should have taken the time to be kind to you, I am sorry.

Shelby

Today I was surprised to hear the phone ring at work...
On the other end was our secretary, informing that there was a call on hold from "Shelby"...
"Shelby?, Shelby who?" At this the secretary was at a loss for words...
I asked if it was a parent or if she could tell me a little more...
She said that she had no idea who was calling and that she would park it on intercom 101.

After taking a moment to think about how the screening process is laking in our school, I took the call and said hello to Shelby...
One of my ten year old students...
She said that she was having trouble installing Quicktime and playing the movie we made on her family's PC...
I had given her an install disc for the software and was really quite stunned with the ease at which this little girl was redoing all of the settings and clicking away in an attempt to get her video to work...

We figured out that she needed the latest version and got it up and running,
but it really was a trip to stand, talking to a ten year old, while the updates ran, hear her video playing in to background and her yelling "Yeah! I worked"...

I think that was the smoothest walk through talk through I have done in a while and it was with a kid that wont 'get to ride a bike without a helmet for another six years....

Go team.

Almost Highly Qualified

Of all the unfortunate pairings...

Today I opened the KEZI site to find my picture and the following headline...



The news crew came to the classroom today to show off our school's use of technology. I have no idea how I ended up under this headline. I should probably get them for slander. Way to go, team.